The Irish Auctioneers and Valuers’ Institute (IAVI) released a lil’ report today. The report states that there are 40,000* (count the zeros) empty apartment units in Dublin. IAVI president Robert Ganly interprets for us mere mortals - “Overall, I would say to people that the market is beginning to stabilise. The worst is over.”

Now, here’s what these same boyos said a year ago about the property market - “Property prices in the State should grow by around 4 to 5 per cent this year, according to the body representing estate agents.”

Here’s another ‘estate agent’ from across the pond (I use quotes because Mr. Adkins seemed to experience, em, favourable treatment and exposure on certain media outlets). Marvel at the similarity of the style.

Now, a concise explanation of exactly what is going on on the financial markets.

Edit: Sadly, Newstalk don’t seem to be podcasting Kiberd’s comments.

Still waiting for the piece de resistance, an audio clip of an angry Damien Kiberd having a go at all the doom-mongers on the breakfast show this morning. He must have felt truly vindicated by the close of trading on the European stock exchanges. It all seemed very rosy by 5pm, didn’t it Damo? Biggest one day losses since 9/11, and it was a public holiday in the US.

But back to the Irish property market. There’s one developer trying to turn his apartment complex into a hotel. A few hundred yards away, another developer has reopened the hotel he recently bought, hoping to convert it into a super-swanky apartment complex that reached almost all the way to the sky. These are the signs of a market that is functioning correctly, right? The fun-da-mentals are sound?

If the above gives you pause for thought, don’t worry too much about it. Tom ‘I’ll say anything on behalf of anyone’ Parlon is on hand to reassure you.

Question 4: will the doomsayers be proved right (needs RealPlayer)

Note how upset Tom gets when Matt Cooper mentions the elephant in the room, sorry, the empty houses all over the country.

Interest rates? Tom knows - “they’re always going to be about 4 per cent”

Even the FT have rumbled us for being a shower of chancers.

Edit, 10:15pm. The chancers are starting to fight amongst themselves. Geoff Tucker, Hooke & MacDonald’s chief ‘economist’ is on Newstalk claiming that the number of vacancies is closer to ‘a few thousand’.